Wii (InstanceTopic, 14)

From Compile Worlds

The Wii is Nintendo's latest standalone gaming console. Like all of Nintendo's hardware, it's robust, fast and cheap. However, the Wii turned out to be the last decent hardware development Nintendo would ever make, and it received a huge amount of shitty add-ons, all in a successful attempt to attract "non-gamers" (i.e. middle-aged blondes).

Wii Fit

Wii Fit is an extremely overpriced weighing boat that connects to your Wii. It attempts to keep you fit by having plenty of stupid minigames that you can do by moving your body. But if you wanna stay fit why the fuck are you staying indoors watching your TV screen?

Wii Motion Plus

Wii Motion Plus is a tiny little cube that you plug onto the end of your Wiimote to make it sense motion more accurately. Some new games coming out require it. But why didn't they just build this into the Wiimote in the first damn place? It's a conspiracy, they must have been plotting from the start to waste your money!

Wii Vitality Sensor

Wii Vitality Sensor is a stupid gadget revealed at E3 2009 which looks like a stapler that you "insert" your finger into. I sure wouldn't - it looks like it's going to bite the damn thing off. I have no idea what the fuck it actually does, but it's obviously going to just be another money-wasting gimmick.